Under the law in NJ, you have the right to represent yourself in a divorce case. Before you file for divorce on your own, you need to talk to your spouse and consider your options: even when you file on your own (pro se), you can choose to use a mediator, who would help you draft your agreement. Your divorce agreement through mediation generally has two stages:
1. A memorandum of understanding- in which the mediator would summarize the things that your partner and you agree upon
2. A marital settlement agreement- which is your memorandum converted into a more formal document which will be filed with the court.
A good mediator would give you precise guidance along the process. The process should typically take 6-10 hours (2-4 meetings). You would be advised to consult with an attorney prior to signing your agreement.
You may also choose to hire an attorney for each of you and embark on a long (and costly) journey to litigation. This is a good option if you believe that your spouse and you are unable to mediate and that your spouse is being dishonest (hiding assets, for example). Do keep in mind,though, that if you have children together, you will be standing together at their graduations and weddings, and as hard as it sometimes may seem, it is always better to separate in good terms-financially, personally and of course, for the sake of your children.
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